Of Sting and Australian Idol.

Just now I watched Australian Idol where the bottom 3 had to perform again in front of the audience before the elimination. One of them is that former pop star, Thanh Bui who was singing Sting's 'Every breath you take'. I've known and liked this song a long time ago, way before P.Diddy(or whatever he is called nowadays) popularized the song by sampling it in his 'I'll be missing you' song. Engulfed with emotions for the past few days, I actually cried. Not because Thanh is probably the one who is voted out but it reminds me heavily of someone. My Abah.

When I was younger, my dad would often sing along or whistle to the song. In the car, when he's having his daily nescafe.....that's the only thing that I could remember about him, before he got ill. I can't remember now, how he was like any other father since he got sick. To tell you the truth, I used to fear him a lot. I was never close to him. He was too occupied with his business dealings...we rarely see each other.

Until he fell ill when I was 12 years old. I had to help my mum to take care of my dad since my mum has to work in order to make ends meet. He couldn't communicate properly, I couldn't understand what he is trying to say.But somehow, we grew emotionally attached.

We became close in some weird way. Maybe the 'Florence Nightingale' effect. Maybe.....

And when I heard the song just now, I missed him. Missed him so badly. Wishing my dad is here with me, sitting there at the corner even when we could go on for hours not talking to each other in the same room. I wish I could turn back the time.I wish I could have hugged him at the airport, something that is alien to my family. If only, if only.........

Abah, baby nak balik rumah..........